Our Government and the Duck Poop!

What would happen if we were to seek out our Governments help with a simple problem like excess duck poop around America's pond. If the Government's response to the Autism Vaccination link is any indication, the conversation would go something like this.

American People: Sir, we seem to have a poop problem around America's ponds. We think it's the ducks.

Government: Well, we asked the Duck Dealers of America and they say it isn't them. So it must not be the ducks.

American People: Yes, I understand, but the children are getting sick from the duck poop and we need to do something about it.

Government: Well now, that's just a coincidence, the children are already sick, it's just the symptoms of exposure to duck poop. It's not actually the duck poop.

American People: You see Sir, the children are brought to the ponds perfectly healthy normal children, then they become exposed to the duck poop...

Government: Alleged duck poop!

American People: Yes of course, alleged duck poop. And then the children become sick. You see how that works sir?

Government: Well, how do we know the children weren't sick before the exposure to the poop or maybe they had a pre-existing condition that was aggravated by the poop -which we have not established is from the ducks.

American People: Sir, we know the poop is from the ducks. Millions of parents have gone to the pond and seen the ducks poop on the shores. They tell the same story over and over with the same results after their children experience the same exposure to the same duck poop.

Government: Clearly, but there could be some other poop that's been on the shores and is masked by the duck poop. Maybe turtle poop!

American People: Not all the ponds have turtles sir and the ducks are the only thing that are in extreme abundance, it is clearly too many ducks. The children are being exposed to this abundance of duck poop and getting sick. And, even if there was some turtle poop it's not in the same aggressive amounts that the duck poop is.

Government: Well now, as I said, we asked the Duck Dealers of America to test it and they said it wasn't the ducks. Could be frogs.

American People: You clearly see that if they say it was the ducks, and they have sold the abundance of ducks to the ponds, that it puts them at risk for lawsuits. With that in mind, do you really believe that they're giving the American people and it's government an unbiased opinion of what's really happening?

Government: Of course they are, they aren't in the business of hurting children.

American People: I'm sure there not sir however, you can see the point I'm trying to make.

Government: No not really.

American People: Let me try to put it more simply for you then sir. If it looks like a duck and it walks like a duck, it's a duck and if you want the American children to stay healthy, cut the shit!